Southern Coalition: The Hitchhikers Guide On How Not To Run A Coalition.

**Rer** · 2012-07-13

Dude they get fined if they :words:, that's economically unfair Endie

**Endie** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by progodlegend

The metric I was always taught for words in a post was:

50% of your words are real words, spelled correctly
50% of those remaining words are sorta like words but you're not sure, like "irregardless" or "commoner garden"
50% of those remaining "words" are ones you saw in a lolcat or just made up because "kazzle" or "strill" sound like they should mean something.

which leaves you with 12.5% percent of your words making sense

**Some Market Dude** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Endie

PGL made it quite clear that it is unfair to expect soco alliances to bring as many words to a post as CFC alliances. We start off knowing a lot more words and pretending that Soco members should be able to match that sort of unfair wordcount is propaganda and trolling.

wololololol

fucking poanedzors brobrah

**Rezorek** · 2012-07-13

Le'Blob isn't even trying anymore

He went down like -A-, what a nice parallel.

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

Le Blob was always shit.

**Sezja** · 2012-07-13

Requesting that "eve-kill" wordfilters to "-A- is shit"

**Ricky** · 2012-07-13

Holy shit. this thread started out well, then turned in to 3 pages of numbers.

cant we just all agree

**Far** · 2012-07-13

ITT: two of the most reasonable kugu posters dickwaggling about how many dead horses fit in a volkswagon van.

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Far

ITT: two of the most reasonable kugu posters dickwaggling about how many dead horses fit in a volkswagon van.

depends on how hard you beat them

**Night** · 2012-07-13

God, it's like the soundclouds all over again reading the channel logs. I have to leave them all open, because every five minutes or so I'll go "wait stop, they did something shit in that one I only just realized". It's bad. It's remarkably bad. It's so bad your mind can't comprehend how bad it is all at once, so it spoonfeeds you it bit by bit after the initial shock wears off.

Nobody really comes out of that chat looking good. They're all delusional, only the scale varies.

**Devilish Ledoux** · 2012-07-13

Statistics aside, we have more dudes to draw from and we're having fun, so more of them show up than would if we weren't. Still, you'd think that the '#1 PVP alliance in Eve' would fight a little harder against an existential threat BEFORE it ends up on their lawn.

**Pastachick** · 2012-07-13

(10:50:32 PM) director bot at goon fleet dot com: If you are contacted by a "GM Pyro" accusing you of 'causing lag' with no reason listed, immediately escalate the petition or comment to a senior GM. Something fishy is afoot.

(3:47:53 PM) aareya: GM Pyro is sending CFC members :
"You have been reported for creating lag to gain an advantage. This is a EULA violation and will not be tolerated. Cease all such activity or risk further repercussions." - GM Pyro
(3:48:04 PM) aareya: There are no details and the pilots in question are asking what they did to get the message.
(3:48:28 PM) aareya: It appears that the commonality is GM Pyro.
(3:48:50 PM) the_mittani: tell them all to escalate it to a senior gm
(3:48:58 PM) the_mittani: I'm not sure who GM Pyro is or what that means, but it's bullshit
(3:49:31 PM) the_mittani: GMs go rogue periodically, and 'YOU ARE MAKING LAG STOP IT' with no explanation screams rogue GM

*** This was a broadcast from the_mittani to all-all, replies are not monitored ***

(10:53:19 PM) director bot at goon fleet dot com: (3:51:37 PM) Blawrf: the_mittani: PK told his fleet members to spam report goons, a blog post someone linked said it was to do with DBRB ordering the fleet to dock up twice and undock in order to switch hardeners

-A- is shit.

*** This was a broadcast from the_mittani to all-all, replies are not monitored ***

**Richter Belmont** · 2012-07-13

So PK has resorted to telling his alliance members to spam-report CFC dudes because his ass is numb from the constant dickings.

I have no words.

**Richter Belmont** · 2012-07-13

Actually yes I do.

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

I don't think -A- really wants to see where playing the petition game will take them

**Agathor** · 2012-07-13

I feel like I am Gregorius, that means Goons are my mother.

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

So what you're saying is Agathor is the Pope of Space

I can see this

**Blawrf** · 2012-07-13

hey look my name in lights

**Agathor** · 2012-07-13

Does that mean PL is my father? IAC is the monastery, oohhh God.

**Some Market Dude** · 2012-07-13

I guess GM Pyro hasn't yet realized who signs his paychecks.

**Rer** · 2012-07-13

Huh there are lots of goons in system.

Hey look TiDi kicked in.

Logically Goons must be trying to intentionally create lag.

Really? Really?

**Blawrf** · 2012-07-13

[02:46:42] GM Sunshine > stop spamming local like you did just now

**Mynt** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Rer

Huh there are lots of goons in system.

Hey look TiDi kicked in.

Logically Goons must be trying to intentionally create lag.

Really? Really?

Mass bends space time altering the rate at which information propagates throughout the universe. Fat jokes never get old.

**Some Market Dude** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Blawrf

[02:46:42] GM Sunshine > stop spamming local like you did just now

gtfo

am I in a time warp to three years ago?

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Mynt

Mass bends space time altering the rate at which information propagates throughout the universe. Fat jokes never get old.

Technically, photons reach their destination instantly.

**Phey Onat** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Fix Lag

Technically, photons reach their destination instantly.

No

But they don't need to be accelerated to hit their max speed.

**Sentinel Eeex** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Far

ITT: two of the most reasonable kugu posters dickwaggling about how many dead horses fit in a volkswagon van.

Well, if they have been cremated...

**Don Peyote** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Some Market Dude

gtfo

am I in a time warp to three years ago?

More like 6 years ago heh - wait, what's that on the horizon? It's monstrous in size and seems to be heading this way in a Thanatos... wait - it can't be - THE DARK LORD HAS RETURNED! REMEDIAL IS BACK RUN FOR YOUR LIVES

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Phey Onat

No

But they don't need to be accelerated to hit their max speed.

They get to where they were going instantly because they travel at the speed of light

It's just not instant to us

Fucking relativity

Also when you pass into the Schwarzschild radius of a black hole you have to cross an infinite distance to reach the singularity at the center

except you reach it instantly because it comes to you

oh did I forget to mention the singularity never moves

oh shit nigga how does that work

fucking science bitch

**WNxWolfy** · 2012-07-13

Awww shit niggas local smackwar between Shadoo and PK going down

opcorn:
http://pastebin.com/5kY1fiM4

**Rer** · 2012-07-13

Copy pasta?

**Rezorek** · 2012-07-13

COPY

PASTE

I heard only stories about Shadoo in local

Perseus Kallistratos > the difference between my spys and shadoos is shadoo throws shitty intel around to try and be cool, whereas my goon director spy sits nice and cozy biding his time

lolll

**Scotch** · 2012-07-13

It's me. I'm the spy.

**Devilish Ledoux** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Scotch

It's me. I'm the spy.

I've never known, but always suspected.

**Scotch** · 2012-07-13

Mild-mannered everygoon by day, sinister double-agent by night.

**Devilish Ledoux** · 2012-07-13

And transsexual prostitute on the weekends.

**Endie** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Rezorek

Perseus Kallistratos > the difference between my spys and shadoos is shadoo throws shitty intel around to try and be cool, whereas my goon director spy sits nice and cozy biding his time

I can quite believe that PK has a spy who is "director" of a member corp, since said corp directors know as much as any other goon. But his flailings and awful guesses in the leaks reassure me once more that AAA have no clue at all about what goes on in illum.

**Don Peyote** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Endie

I can quite believe that PK has a spy who is "director" of a member corp, since said corp directors know as much as any other goon. But his flailings and awful guesses in the leaks reassure me once more that AAA have no clue at all about what goes on in illum.

It's writing Harry Potter fanfics isn't it

You can answer me Endie I won't tell

**Scotch** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Don Peyote

It's writing Harry Potter fanfics isn't it

You can answer me Endie I won't tell

That's sooooooo 2008. They're on to Hunger Games slashfic now.

**Don Peyote** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Scotch

That's sooooooo 2008. They're on to Hunger Games slashfic now.

Damn, my intel is out of date - that's the last time I share spies with PK

**Devilish Ledoux** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Endie

I can quite believe that PK has a spy who is "director" of a member corp, since said corp directors know as much as any other goon. But his flailings and awful guesses in the leaks reassure me once more that AAA have no clue at all about what goes on in illum.

Oh, sure. Like having a director-level spy in the coalition that is currently making your alliance look like idiots means you HAVE to use it to get useful intel. Long game, motherfuckers.

**Themick** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Far

ITT: two of the most reasonable kugu posters dickwaggling about how many dead horses fit in a volkswagon van.

I was personally wondering how many soco fit into 319...

**penifSMASH** · 2012-07-13

That Viking Empire guy in those logs with the 70 personal supercaps also has a goon director spy, just waiting to supplant evil weasel and steal all the tech. Be careful, gentle goonie friends

**Elise Randolph** · 2012-07-13

It all makes sense now. PK has a director spy in Goons so he knew everything he said was being leaked so he decided to be a terrible sperging retard /to troll everyone/.

**Skabbor** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by WNxWolfy

Awww shit niggas local smackwar between Shadoo and PK going down

opcorn:
http://pastebin.com/5kY1fiM4

How could anyone possibly listen to that guy? He's so obviously retarded, not talking in-game sperg retarded either, more like sitting in the bathroom rubbing peanut butter all over himself while masturbating level retarded.

**Fix Lag** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by penifSMASH

That Viking Empire guy in those logs with the 70 personal supercaps also has a goon director spy, just waiting to supplant evil weasel and steal all the tech. Be careful, gentle goonie friends

*had

word on the street is CCP doesn't take kindly to RMT-folk

**Grath** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Rezorek

Perseus Kallistratos > the difference between my spys and shadoos is shadoo throws shitty intel around to try and be cool, whereas my goon director spy sits nice and cozy biding his time

lolll

Anytime you find somebody bragging about their spies they almost universally have none.

Saying that, every AAA spy ever caught, was caught because one of the retards in AAA brag about it.

**syndic thrass** · 2012-07-13

I still haven't figured out why anyone thinks blueballing Goons with sov shots will actually break morale. We have Dabigredboat, that shit ain't even blue balling to him, if we ever got in a war where we didn't have to to sov structure grinds in Drakes I think we would just completely lose our rhythm.

CONDI we do not forgive,
And we will not stop killing your TCUs because of it

**Some Market Dude** · 2012-07-13

DBRB is the CFC.

Mittani is just his sockpuppet.

**Toasted** · 2012-07-13

Originally Posted by Grath

Anytime you find somebody bragging about their spies they almost universally have none.

Saying that, every AAA spy ever caught, was caught because one of the retards in AAA brag about it.

Fortunately this gentleman isn't a senior FC, isn't a go-to guy for the mythical AAA super fleet and doesn't call the shots on policy...right?

RIGHT?

Thread: Southern Coalition: The Hitchhikers Guide On How Not To Run A Coalition.

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